The Showdown

Mrs. X is coming to my house tomorrow. I am ready for her.

I looked up how to say "dustpan" in Spanish (it is "recogedor" in case you are wondering). I plan to ask her about the missing recogedors, but I don't really expect her to fess up about taking them. Besides interrogating her, I need a plan to protect the innocent new dustpan I just bought.

Here are some ideas I had and some suggestions friends have given me about foiling her plans to steal the new dustpan:

-hide it somewhere and hang bells on it to alert me if she touches it

-put one of those invisible dog fences up around my yard and attach the shock collar to the dustpan so it will shock her if she leaves our property with it

-attach an inconspicuous GPS tracking device to the dustpan so I can track it if she takes it

-leave it out in the open as bait and install a nanny cam to spy on her to see what she does with it

-follow her out to her car and demand to search her trunk to see if it is full of dustpans

I like all of these ideas, but I came up with something on my own that I think will work. Here are some pictures of my high-tech theft prevention system:

Not bad, huh? I think my plan is brilliant in its simplicity. Yes, Mrs. X might think I am crazy. She might be right, too, but at least I will be a crazy person with a recogedor.